Friday, March 20, 2009
Eek. I'm getting close. Could be 5 weeks could be 9 weeks. Trying to think 9 weeks, but it is so hard to not wonder if this baby could be early like Selena. She was so big at 37 weeks (7lbs 6oz), had a full head of hair, long fingernails. I never measured ahead with her, but obviously she was ready to come early. I figured I just baked them quick. But while my stomach is now bigger than it was when Selena was born this baby doesn't feel as big inside me. He or she is still moving around a bit whereas Selena pretty much got in position around 32 weeks and stayed there. With Selena I could feel an obvious head really low in my pelvis, but I haven't felt that yet with this one. It would be more convenient to Floyd's schedule if this baby came closer to the due date. Oh well, the baby will come whenever he or she is ready.
My last appointment the baby's head was down so that was good to hear. The baby was actually exactly how I thought it was facing up with its feet on the top right of my belly head, lower left, so that made me feel confident that I do know what is going on in there. I can feel it flip occasionally so its back is facing out, but it still mostly hangs out on the right side of my belly. Supposedly it makes for an easier labor for the baby to be on your left side, so I'm continuing to do pelvic tilts and am trying to lie on my left side more often, but it is just more comfortable to lie on my right so I often wake up in the middle of the night on my right side.
Finally being done working has made it a lot easier on me. I've been able to take naps and not having any stress of deadlines has made me feel a lot better. The heartburn seems to come and go but hasn't been too bad. I now know not to stretch my legs and point my toes when I wake up in the morning so I can avoid painful cramps. I try to eat some before I go to bed to avoid waking up in the middle of the night hungry, but sometimes this backfires and causes heartburn.
I've also started the hypnobabies program and that really helps keep a positive mindset and is so relaxing. But now I am thinking more about the birth and wondering what will happen. While Selena's birth seemed so difficult at the time if I think back it really was relatively easy. It was relatively short being only 6 1/2 hrs of active labor (technically it was 8 hrs but my contractions didn't start till an hour and a half after my water broke). The last hour of pushing was pretty hard, the hour before that was uncomfortable but manageable, and before that it was really easy even though my pressure waves (hypno speak for contractions) were 2-3 minutes apart the entire time. I'm not sure if it was the hypnosis, the tub, being in a relaxing place, or the combination of everything, but they really were easy, they didn't hurt, but they were definitely strong because I dilated pretty fast (2 cm per hour). I missed transition which is supposedly the hardest part. When I reread my birth story I said that I hit transition when I got out of the tub, but by then I was already complete, so transition was before that when I distinctly remember thinking, "I can do this for a few hours, but if it is going to last longer than that I might be in trouble." Even when I was pushing I still wouldn't describe it as painful, it was just exhausting. I found it very similar to hitting the wall at the end of a race but still having a long ways to go before the end of the race. Even the "ring of fire" wasn't bad. It stung, but not horribly.
But I'm wondering what will happen this time. Will my water break again? or will I have pre-labor off and on for a few days or weeks before? Will pushing be easier this time? Will my plan to make it easier really work? Will the first or second stage be harder or longer this time, or shorter and easier? Will I do a water birth this time, or will it feel wrong for some reason? I do believe in the hypnosis more this time which should make it work better, and so far it seems to. Last pregnancy I was pretty conscious during the entire script, this time I check out/fall asleep/go into hypnotic amnesia or whatever you want to call it, but wake up as soon as the script is over and it tells me to get up. I admit last time I was slightly doubtful and maybe even wanted it to not work too well because I wanted the satisfaction of feeling like I accomplished something difficult. Well that was pretty much exactly what I got. It worked really well for 80-90% the time, but there was a tough part. This time I want a completely pain-free birth. Then I can have the satisfaction of being able to say that I was able to put mind over matter. But only time will tell how it ends up.
I've got a list of nesting things I'd like to do before the baby gets here. It is kind of annoying because I really wanted to get these things done before it became a real trial to bend over, but since I ended up working longer than planned that didn't happen. Floyd has spring break in a couple weeks so hopefully he'll be sympathetic to my hormonal impulses and help me out.
Here are some more belly pics. I didn't grow that much in the last four weeks, so maybe I'm evening out now.